Why You Need a Sales Writer

sales writer

John Deere gave content marketing its first breath of life in 1895 with the launch of The Furrow. This was and still is a legendary publication. It is possibly the only periodical whose fans still prefer print to digital.

So what did it do? The magazine gave advice to farmers on how to be more profitable in their craft. That’s what makes it sales content writing. It incorporated the details of proprietary design specifications of John Deere farming equipment to create specific advice on how to optimize crop yield. And there was no Roundup back then, so farmers weren’t racing the clock against beard cancer and had time to read a bit.

But Were Sales Writers On Board?

Well, yes. The magazine had a small team of writers. Now, writing highly technical material was a round the clock job in the 1800s. In order to have breakfast someone had to chop wood, fetch eggs, milk a cow, kill a pig and knock down Charlotte’s web with a broom. That means to be a writer, someone had to know not only how to string a few sentences together, they also had to be good enough to be allowed not to have to do any of the hard work of everyday life in the 1800s.

So John Deere was the only organization in the world with a handful of literate specialists with the specific knowledge of how to write material that did two things; sell more tractors, and make the customer’s use of those tractors more profitable. There were a few hiccups along the way. But readers had no other option at the time. When too many sponsored editorials started showing up in the magazine, they let the publisher know.

Dear Mr. G.L. Shaul,

Last month’s missive on the H-Gold Cattle Botherer was absolute guttersnipe. I happen to personally know many respectable cattle who have been bothered by that machine. They say it is most decidedly not Shinola- rather it’s counterpart in the common phrase. […]”

John Deere got a lot of these kinds of letters until they dropped the corporate sponsors and regained editorial authenticity. But the lesson of The Furrow is threefold; number one, have a world-class product or service; two, have access to literate nerds; and three, figure out a way to get those nerds to spend their time writing about cattle bothering rather than actually bothering cattle. (You should probably toss in a marketing strategy, but these things work best in 3s, so…)

The first part is up to you. The second part is about not going to one of those cheap content mills whose editorial team is composed E.S.L. exchange students desperate to stay indoors to avoid human traffickers. Since you’re here, rather than browsing through the misfits at REDACTED, you’ve got that part taken care of. As for the third part, well, modern information technology has brought the literate nerds to you. {doffs hat}

Now there’s just one question left to ask. Do you feel lucky?

 

 

You’ll have to excuse me. I have a condition that compels me to quote Clint Eastwood characters in editorials. But that’s what editors are for. {Editor agrees that quote is appropriate here.}

Do You Need A Sales Writer?

The question you have to ask yourself is, are you unconcerned about your spinal health? Are you willing to develop hemorrhoids? Do you have what it takes to sit in a chair by yourself for hours on hours every day while your friends and family think you’re just goofing off on the Internet? Do you mind losing your eyesight? Does inoperable cystic ocular hemorrhaging not frighten you? Do you want your chair to smell like all of your worst habits? Do you care enough about language and tone enough to let your friends go to the bar without you every week? Do you like to drink alone?

If you answered ‘no’ to any of these questions, then you, my dove, are in need of a sales writer.

While you’re out there soaking up all the glory, encoding the phone numbers of liaison personnel, and putting little red dots on the palm of your hand dinging that bell at the front desk of a Holiday Inn, you need someone twisted enough, obsessive enough, and wonky enough to sit down at a desk and create sales copy that backs up every irresponsible claim you’re making at sales conferences. (That is the longest sentence you’re likely to encounter in a piece of web copy, and I challenge you to tell me it doesn’t work. Go on. Do I need to quote Clint again?)

Here are 3 Unassailable Reasons You Need a Sales Writer:

1. We are pro’s, my dude

The content you present to the public represents your brand. Anytime people read anything, they are looking for an excuse to stop. Why? Because they would probably rather be doing something else, and having an excuse to reject a piece of writing makes people feel good about themselves. That’s why the content you post needs to be professional and spotless.

2. We actually know what SEO is

Everybody thinks they understand Search Engine Optimization. Well, they don’t. Professional writers of any kind have a special affinity for words and understand how they are best used. SEO is the application of that skill to the obscure and shifting dialects of the Interwebs (and maybe being roommates with one of Google’s search-term ranking justicars).

3. Your refrigerator is running…

The bandwidth connection between the brain of the writer and a word processor is the weakest in all of information technology. This is because humans have no USB ports on their heads, and humans are still better writers than machines. What that means is, writing is slow. It is so slow that I was tempted to write the word like this ‘SLOOOOOOOWWWWWWAHH.’ But I’m a pro, so I didn’t. The fact is, you don’t have time. You have to innovate, sling product, take names, and stay at Holiday Inns.

Any questions?

 

DL M has 21 years of professional writing for print and online media and has 10+ years experience as a freelance fiction editor. He’s a content creator for major corporations covering all topics for a wide range of industries, specializing in white papers, research, news content. His specialty subjects include: current events, marketing, analytics, personal development, leveraging social media, SEO, business development, cloud computing, language, and politics.